November 16, 2017

Loss > Gain

Why loss can bring so much more than we think.

Loss can be a hard thing to deal with. This year alone, within the space of five months, I’ve lost four people that were and are still very dear to my heart. But what these events have taught me is that loss is not solely about losing something or feeling empty, it’s about what you gain. So here are three points I’ve learned about gaining while losing.

Loss can build character

I can surely say I’m a much stronger person due to loss. Now, this doesn’t mean that losing someone or something you love won’t hurt, but it will build you up to become mentally, spiritually and maybe even physically stronger. It’s like gold being refined by fire. It’s under a lot of pressure and heat, but once it’s out of the furnace and into it’s settled environment, it shines and glows like never before.

Loss can build relationships

Family are important. Friends are important. But you never know what you had until it’s gone, right? I’ve always been someone who highly values relationships and through loss I have clung tighter to them; however, some I’m still working on. But, I’ve started to alter my relationship vocabulary and replace the word ‘value’ with ‘treasure.’ Why? Because when something is treasured, it is seen as sacred—often guarded carefully and cherished deeply. Sometimes switching up words, even if they hold similar meanings, can make a big difference in how you view life. It’s like saying, “I’m in awe of you” rather than saying “I’m amazed by you.” See the difference?

Finally, loss can build hope—if you let it

Hope is beautiful. It goes where logic and reasoning can’t. It allows you to hold on when nothing makes sense. Regardless of the depth of my loss, something within me still notices the sun shining. I’m alive—my purpose isn’t over and neither is yours. So remember, hope is the one thing you don’t want to lose.

I’ve come a long way through this past season. Grown and shaped by the loss that could have broken me, I never thought such an accumulation of it would amount to such an abundance of lessons. But life’s about learning and growth and I’ve learned that loss hurts but gain heals.

Published by Deborah Williams in Lifestyle

Photography by Tanja Heffner

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